Well, sometimes my life
Just don't make sense at all
When the mountains look so big
And my faith just seems so small

CHORUS:
So hold me Jesus, 'cause I'm shaking like a leaf
You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

And I wake up in the night and feel the dark
It's so hot inside my soul
I swear there must be blisters on my heart

CHORUS

Surrender don't come natural to me
I'd rather fight You for something
I don't really want
Than to take what You give that I need
And I've beat my head against so many walls
Now I'm falling down, I'm falling on my knees

And this Salvation Army band
Is playing this hymn
And Your grace rings out so deep
It makes my resistance seem so thin

CHORUS

You have been King of my glory
Won't You be my Prince of Peace

-rich mullins-

so i am the new sunbeam leader at the corps (thank you elizabeth!) and i had "all my training" today. it was somewhat overwhelming at first, but having taken all the stuff home and re-organizing it a bit, it made so much more sense! it's kind of exciting, actually.

i never thought i'd say that, but there ya go!

don't worry about anything;
instead, pray about everything.

tell God what you need and thank him for all he has done. if you do this you will experience God's peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. his peace will guard your hearts and mind as you live in Christ Jesus.

philippians 4:6-7

i got a call from my mother-in-law last night about 10:30 saying that my father-in-law is in the hospital, again, with congestive heart failure, again. this is bad enough, but to add to it, robert is in russia until next wednesday.

apparently, he'll be in the hospital until he is stabalized...however long that takes. pray for him.

so...pluto isn't a planet anymore. apparently. check it out.

read about pluto's fate here

kinda makes you question everything else you learned in school...

good day.

spent the day with sheri. it was nice to just hang out and talk. we put her new bed together -- great fun! two smart women working with power tools. can't beat it!!!

i met the infamous ryan. seems like a nice guy! [you hurt her = i kill you! :-)] just kidding....halfway. i had the same discussion with jeff. ask him about it. it was funny!!!

anyway, it was a good day. now i'm off to spend the evening with my husband. one of the last few before the dreaded russia trip....i'm freaking out!!!! but video games always make the evening fun!!!!!!



good day.

so i'm home. vacation was great...except my husband wasn't with me. there are pros and cons to not having a job. taking vacation without your husband is a definite con. it did, however, provide some much needed rest and relaxation. just for clarification: not having a job does not automatically equal rest and relaxation. quite the contrary, actually. the past few months have been such a roller coaster of emotions. it's been so nice traveling with robert. but at the same time, i've lost a sense of who i am and where i belong. my life is so wonderful: i have an incredible husband whom i love dearly and who loves me, i have a thousand blessings all around me and yet in the middle of all that, i find myself somewhat overwhelmed with life. i get frustrated with myself for not being able to see and accept the wonderful things god has for me. i keep asking myself why i can't just be content. but that's the thing: i am content. in some aspects. but there are some where i want to scream!

maybe i want to be something i'm not. maybe i'm expecting too much. but then again...

do you ever feel like you're trying to grasp something that is just out of your reach and every time you get close enough to touch it, it moves again? that's how i feel right now. the problem is, i'm not 100% sure of what it is i'm trying to grasp.

i know this doesn't make much sense, but there's something about sending this out to the void. so goodnight, void. your presence has been helpful.

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after i posted, i found this on jamie's site.

Hearing Gods Music
by Max Lucado

Let's imagine that you want to learn to dance. Being the rational, cerebral person you are, you go to a bookstore and buy a book on dancing. You take the book home and get to work. Finally, you think youve got it, and you invite your wife to come in and watch. You hold the book open and follow the instructions step by step. You even read the words aloud so shell know that youve done your homework. Lean with your right shoulder, and so you lean. Now step with your right foot, and so you step. Turn slowly to the left, and so you do.

You continue to read, then dance, read, then dance, until the dance is completed. You plop exhausted on the couch, look at your wife, and proclaim, I executed it perfectly.

She extends her hand and the music begins. The next thing you know, you are dancing and you dont even have the book.We Christians are prone to follow the book while ignoring the music. We master the doctrine, outline the chapters, memorize the dispensations, debate the rules, and stiffly step down the dance floor of life with no music in our hearts. We measure each step, calibrate each turn, and flop into bed each night exhausted from another day of dancing by the book.Dancing with no music is tough stuff.

Let God have you, and let God love you and dont be surprised if your heart begins to hear music youve never heard and your feet learn to dance as never before.

~ Max Lucado ~

Vacation in New York

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hello all --

the past few days haven't been the best. i was supposed to go to nicole and bobby's wedding today but couldn't make it because i've had some crap i've been dealing with. i felt really bad about not being able to see them get married -- i SOOOOOO wanted to be there.

i haven't slept in 2 nights. my body and mind are completely exhausted. i got a little sleep between 10am and 1pm today - but that's about all i've had for 2 days now. needless to say, i'm completely out of it. is it just me? or does it seem like sometimes we can never catch a break?

my mom got me a ticket to go with her to lake placid, ny tomorrow morning. so i will be going up there to spend a week with my family. i'm hoping i'll be able to relax and get some rest while being with my family. a lot of them will be there, so i'm excited about that.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *


6 years ago today.

wow.

talitha is here!!!!!!! (and connie looks FABULOUS!)

Watch Video Here

Baby Got Book

just a few videos i found funny.....none of them are over 1min 30sec. i thought they were hilarious!!!

...or maybe i'm just tired...???
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this is the best one....it's a little over 2 min but totally worth it!!